most royal greening verdancy,
rooted in the sun,
you shine with radiant light.
– Hildegard of Bingen, 1098–1179
In some spiritual traditions, there is a time of reflection that precedes the start of spring. In the Christian tradition, it is linked to Lent and Easter – the time of wandering in the desert – facing our dark side – and resurrection. In rituals surrounding the new and full moon, many people use the Full Moon as a time to acknowledge and let go of behaviors or beliefs which no longer serve our best interest. The New Moon is a time to invite in new behaviors, beliefs, or manifestations which we are ready now to embrace.
For me, one obstacle that often gets in my way is my attitude toward myself – in the spring or any other time. Do you know what I mean?
I let so many things interfere with a loving relationship with myself. For instance, I:
…think it is my job to take care of and give love to everyone else before I tend to Me;
…haven’t yet forgiven myself for hurting others or making mistakes in my life;
…am self-conscious because I am poignantly aware of my flaws;
…think that it is my job to make the toxic people who have hurt me feel okay, too;
…believe that if I’m not perfect, that makes me bad;
…essentially, drive myself nuts.
This is all such craziness brought on by the self (small “s”). My higher Self knows that I need to:
…love myself first (fill the inner well), so that I have some inner resources to share when I choose to do so;
…love myself, forgive myself, have compassion for myself – treat myself as I would treat my very best friend;
…get over thinking so much about the little self, the ego-driven self. Who really cares about my flaws? Only me. (And if someone does care about them… Oh well. That’s their deal.)
…love myself by setting boundaries and saying, “No” to those who are toxic to my spirit and soul – lovingly, but firmly, and without guilt;
…get over perfectionism. Who wants to be around a perfect person anyway? Not me. I want real, nitty, gritty friends and neighbors who have been through the mill, down through the dark valley, and back again; who laugh at their flaws, struggle, and have compassion for the journey. It can be rough! And if we don’t have a sense of humor and humility, we will end up bitter, brittle, and broken.
…give ourselves a break, with the help of God/Goddess, the Universe, friends, our spiritual guides and helpers.
So here’s what I’m doing this spring. I’m soaking in the Love. Try it! Take some time to absorb beauty, to allow love (from you, others, the Universe, God, Spirit) to permeate your molecules, to feel connection with Nature, to soak in the tub and release toxins, and begin to open to something new. Allow the wind of spirit to blow through your soul and clear out all of those dark, cobwebby corners. Then, open to new beginnings – whatever that means to you. Seek soul support. Share your light wherever you go. And allow the Sacred to tend those tender seeds and sprouts and bring new growth.